novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
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Post by novisnick on Jun 11, 2020 23:57:49 GMT -5
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Post by DavidR on Jun 12, 2020 8:20:53 GMT -5
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Post by DavidR on Jun 12, 2020 10:51:57 GMT -5
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?'
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'
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Post by pedrocols on Jun 12, 2020 14:50:06 GMT -5
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?' The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: 1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. 2. The bouncer is a blonde girl. 3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. 4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter. 5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler. Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?' The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.' 🤣🤣🤣
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Post by The Mad Norseman on Jun 12, 2020 20:22:38 GMT -5
In the great days of the British Empire a new commanding officer was sent to a remote African bush outpost to relieve the retiring colonel. After welcoming his replacement and showing the usual courtesies of gin and tonic, cucumber sandwiches etc., decreed by protocol, the retiring colonel said, "You must meet my Adjutant, Captain Smithers. He's my right-hand man and is really the strength of this entire post. His talent and energy is simply boundless.” Captain Smithers was summoned and introduced to the new Commanding Officer who was surprised to meet a hunchbacked, one-eyed, toothless, hairless, scabbed and pockmarked specimen of humanity, a particularly unattractive man less than three feet tall. "Smithers, old man, tell your new CO about yourself.” "Well, sir, I graduated with honors from Sandhurst, joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines. I represented Great Britain in equestrian events and won a Silver Medal in the middleweight boxing division of the Olympics. I have researched the history of.....” At which point the colonel interrupted, "Yes, yes, never mind that Smithers, he can find all that in your file. Tell him about the day you told the witch doctor to fu*k off."
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jun 12, 2020 23:57:05 GMT -5
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novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
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Post by novisnick on Jun 13, 2020 2:05:22 GMT -5
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Post by DavidR on Jun 13, 2020 8:40:34 GMT -5
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novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
|
Post by novisnick on Jun 13, 2020 23:15:20 GMT -5
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novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
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Post by novisnick on Jun 13, 2020 23:16:41 GMT -5
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Post by DavidR on Jun 14, 2020 9:21:55 GMT -5
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novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
|
Post by novisnick on Jun 15, 2020 0:20:15 GMT -5
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Post by DavidR on Jun 15, 2020 7:55:03 GMT -5
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novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
|
Post by novisnick on Jun 15, 2020 19:10:06 GMT -5
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Post by monkumonku on Jun 15, 2020 19:45:42 GMT -5
Yes, educate yourself. You have a systemic fruit problem.
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Post by DavidR on Jun 16, 2020 9:37:40 GMT -5
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Post by DavidR on Jun 17, 2020 8:34:56 GMT -5
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novisnick
EmoPhile
CEO Secret Monoblock Society
Posts: 27,230
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Post by novisnick on Jun 18, 2020 22:48:48 GMT -5
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jun 19, 2020 4:00:46 GMT -5
Yes, educate yourself. You have a systemic fruit problem.
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Post by monkumonku on Jun 19, 2020 9:51:06 GMT -5
Yes, educate yourself. You have a systemic fruit problem. Excuse me, but you are engaging in JMilton appropriation. Educate yourself.
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